I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
where am i from again
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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