Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize