i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
