To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Randomize
