I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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