How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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