i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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