Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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