i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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