i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
she smelled like a LAN party
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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