I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
