I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
