Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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