he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Randomize
