Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Farmville is her only friend.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
