Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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