Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
