38 yer olds are good kisserssss
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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