please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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