Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
