"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
