The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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