Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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