But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Randomize
