sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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