Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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