once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
