did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
