i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
