operation harelip BJ is a go
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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