wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Randomize
