due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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