Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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