the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
