: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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