I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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