so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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