u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
