I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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