so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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