Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
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