You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
