Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
