I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
