well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
