You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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