You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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