I must be too annoying 4 u.
no, he came in my armpit
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
