I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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