is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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