quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
