The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
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