You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Dignity is for republicans.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
